In my previous blog “What this trip has taught me” I lined up a few things that I want to change in my life and promised to write a blog about every single one of the goals. This blog post is about goal number one
Be the person I really want to be, without caring about others opinion of me
So why set this as a goal? Am I not the person I really want to be?
My answer would unfortunately have to be “Not really”
During our travels and meeting people from all over the world, I really started to understand the true meaning of the words
Somehow especially in Canada people seamed to me completely in peace with themselves and their surroundings and didn’t give a damn about other peoples opinion of them. Someone even told me
why ever bother trying to please everyone else, when in the end all that really matters in the end is your own comfort zone.
She had a point – I mean why do we actually try to please everyone else but our selves ? To get love? Gratitude ? Acceptance? Friends? What?
And the people/world we are constantly trying to please and behave like, do they really care at all?
Traveling I set a goal to be myself and behave no other way when meeting new people. And you know what? I’ve never felt better in my entire life!
I made real friends who like me for me, discovered things that really had my interest, tried new things just out of curiosity -because yes I am curious. And I know whenever our paths meet again I don’t have to worry about how to act around these people – because I can just be myself.
So who have I been then?
I have of course still been me, just another more insecure version.
I used to think that having a carrier and being important, going to meetings and such was the kind of life I was suppose to live. I mean that was what was expected of me. So I took an education working in office and became politicly active.
I moved to the city, had friends there and tried to fit in the best I could. Partied way to much and lived a selfish lifestyle.
Although I soon learned that I was becoming a whole different person that I wanted to be and even respected.
I hated my job, my friends where all the kind of people who where happy if someone else was miserable and living in the city didn’t fulfill me at all.
I can’t live my life with regret, but instead I choose to see these years as a lesson.
And I am forever grateful to my mother and John for making me realize that I had to live my own life.
So I decided to cut all contacted to my so called friends who constantly lied and treated people like shit. Cut the drama. Quit my job. Go traveling. And start a life worth living .
Of course all this happened and is going to continue to happen over a long period of time, and it isn’t always going to be easy for sure.
So what kind of person do I really wan’t to be?
My big dream is to be someone people remember as kind, friendly and helpful.
Someone who has at least changed life for the better.
Someone who did good to the world and helped people in need.
Open my own cafe and be an awesome cook.
Love with all of my heart.
Be creative and self sufficient.
Making an income doing what I love.
Be a good and loving wife to my husband and kiss him whenever I want to.
Be the person my dog thinks I am.
Join a church/ community.
Simply just be me!
This might all seam all to pink and perfect to some of you, but this is what I will try to achieve at least.
I know I am not perfect and that some of my goals probably will fail more than once. But living a better life and being a better person is a realistic goal in my eyes.
My question to you is – are you who you really want to be ?